In July, my Aunt and Uncle celebrated their 62-year wedding anniversary.
My disclaimer is that I love my whole family. I come from a big family on my mom’s side and my dad’s side. My grandmother has nine brothers and sisters on my Guyanese side. Growing up as an only child, my parents divorced when I was seven, and my grandparents divorced around the same time. I was quiet, observant, learning about sacrifice and relationships. I learned the strength it takes to leave and the aftermath that follows. But I also learned something else. That love and distance can coexist.
My summers were split between Egypt and Canada, immersed in a family that never treated me like a stranger, and at the center of it all were my great-aunt and great-uncle. My aunt and uncle, as I call them. They’ve been married for sixty-one years. If I did my math right, he was twenty-one, and she was eighteen when they married. And my mom was the flower girl at their wedding. My uncle is full of love and jokes, and my aunt is full of love and laughter, and their love for each other extends to everyone around them.
I have this theory that because of their love for my grandmother, it extends to my mom, which then extends to me. Which I am very grateful for. They showed me what enduring love looks like. It’s not perfect, but it’s present. It’s not loud, but it’s lasting. I remember one late-night conversation with my aunt about ten years ago. I was going back and forth about investing in a certificate program at Stanford. I was unsure, and I was hesitant. And she just looked at me and said, “Invest in yourself.” When I got home, that’s exactly what I did. And I haven’t stopped since.
That moment changed my life. Learning to invest in myself created a balance I didn’t know was possible. People say grandparents love their grandchildren differently than they love their own kids. That’s how my aunt and uncle’s love feels. It feels different from my parents' love and different from my grandparents'. It’s a love that taught me what wholeness looks like. What it means to stay, to laugh. To grow together across decades. I am so grateful to have experienced their love.
My aunt has always told me she loves me and shows me. From paying attention to the Guyanese food I love, staying up late at night to talk about life, to her and my uncle always coming outside to wave me goodbye when it was time for me to leave. I would fight back the tears. I never grew out of not crying when we part ways.
I know their love for me is an extension of their love for her sister (my grandmother), their niece (my mother), and now me.
Living away from family, and yet still feeling like family, when everyone comes together, is a gift. You don’t have as many stories together as everyone else. But they watched you, and the generations before you, grow up in front of their eyes. What a blessing. I am grateful beyond words.
Rich because I have experienced my aunt’s love and her homemade pine tarts, cheese rolls, and beef patties fresh out of the oven. ♥️ 🇬🇾
Here is a video I made last year that I didn't share.